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    Heleo | Ozan Varol | 7 min
    4 reads4 comments
    9.7
    Heleo
    4 reads
    9.7
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    • chrissetiana
      Top reader this weekReading streak
      1 month ago

      Humans operate on different frequencies. If someone disagrees with you, it’s not because they’re wrong, and you’re right. It’s because they believe something that you don’t believe.

      My favorite line. We tend to always get this skewed in the heat of things.

      • SEnkey
        Top reader this weekScoutScribe
        1 month ago

        Great point. It is also the case that discussing those values, and how we differ in values or differ in prioritizing the same values leads to a more understanding view of our "opponents" and brings the passion down.

        There is a big difference between discussing the merits of a social program with someone that you know wants to care for people but also wants have a dynamic economy (because he/she believes this will also help people) and debating that same program with some you think just wants to push granny off a cliff.

    • deephdave
      Top reader this weekReading streakScout
      8 months ago

      Great article!

      The key is to trick the mind by giving it an excuse. Convince your own mind (or your friend) that your prior decision or prior belief was the right one given what you knew, but now that the underlying facts have changed, so should the mind.

      Democrats in the United States are already falling into this trap. They’re not going to win the 2020 presidential elections by convincing Donald Trump supporters that they were wrong to vote for him last November or that they’re responsible for his failures in office. Instead, as author and psychology professor Robert Cialdini explains, Democrats must offer Trump supporters a way to get out of their prior commitment while saving face: “Well, of course you were in a position to make that decision in November because no one knew about X.”

      Make a point to befriend people who disagree with you. Expose yourself to environments where your opinions can be challenged, as uncomfortable and awkward as that might be.

      Marc Andreessen has a saying that I love: “Strong beliefs, loosely held.” Strongly believe in an idea, but be willing to change your opinion if the facts show otherwise