1. The world's best reading app

    Get started today. Pick any price for unlimited, ad-free reading.

    The New York Times CompanyEmma Pattee11/20/1911 min
    23 reads6 comments
    9.4
    The New York Times Company
    23 reads
    9.4
    You must read the article before you can post or reply.
    • bill
      Top reader of all timeScout
      1 year ago

      Great night time read! I hope this AOTDs! Such a great combo of interesting and practical. “Pay close attention” is life advice that basically applies to absolutely everything.

      • Karenz
        Scribe
        1 year ago

        I really learned this when I was raising and training an Arabian filly from 6 months old to maturity. If I weren’t paying attention, she could step on my foot, hit me in the face with her head, buck me off her back! It was crucial for my safety and developing a relationship with her that she got my undivided attention. I finally got the horse I always wanted at 58 years old and am riding into my 70’s!!! She has taught me the importance of attention—and intimacy with another species!

        • bill
          Top reader of all timeScout
          1 year ago

          Wonderful! It’s all about attention!

      • Alexa
        ScoutScribe
        1 year ago

        Agreed, this is great. I made a promise to build community where I live in the last year and it has been hard but worth it. New people I’m building friendships with often remark how novel it is to be regularly invited to do things by someone, we’re clearly not flexing our friend making muscles enough. Defo AOTD material.

    • Pegeen
      ScoutScribe
      1 year ago

      Sound advice. From my experience, knowing, understanding, accepting and loving yourself first is key to being a really good friend. Feeling secure in who you are allows for vulnerability which leads to authenticity.

    • jeff
      Top reader this weekReading streakScoutScribe
      1 year ago

      Wasn't expecting much given the title but was pleasantly surprised by the depth and thoughtfulness of this article. Friendships can be tricky. I just started re-watching Seinfeld and had forgotten that the very first (non-pilot) episode was "Male Unbonding." The show did such a great job exploring the difficulties and intricacies of both same and different-sex friendships throughout its run.