I really enjoyed this article, how it unfolded, the intertwining of the author’s feelings with the works of the artist Kusama. Crushes are an initiation, of sorts, perhaps even a necessary part of our growth. In my 65 years of living, I have had crushes and they were as dramatic as depicted in this author’s article. And it’s the drama, the heightened sense of every aspect of my life while in the “crush state,” that seems to be what I loved the most. Over time, the crush state became a way of life for me. No longer needing a person as initiator of my heightened state, life itself became my muse. Opening to receive this magical perception has changed me. Intimacy arrives on long walks in nature, in my paying deep attention to where I am, in listening attentively to what the wind is saying. I have such a crush on silence.
That is poetry. To have a crush on silence, what a gift.
Ha! You know as someone who has children, no? Carving out time for myself was much more difficult when I had a young family and work. But my husband was very helpful and making that time to enjoy my other passions was a life saver. Made me a better mom and wife. I also found I needed to be alone to hear my inner voice, my untamed wild self, my true self. That’s why I had a crush on silence - to stay intimate with her. I only hope you can allow that gift for yourself as well. We all need it, just like air. Thanks for your comment!
Terrific read. The only point that lost me a bit was the abrupt shift into the art gallery world and Kusama. It jarred the reading experience for me. However, I understand the point. I feel the transition could have possibly been smoother to the overall effective flow.
I Deeply admire the sloooowness of the crush trajectory expressed by the writer. By the end there is a sense of a fulfilling intimacy not, ultimately, lost in translation by by the initial crush.
Couldn’t agree more with so much of this... how crushes are the liminal, in-between space that is filled with excitement, fear, desire, doubt... a space where we tell ourselves certain stories...
This is such a beautiful piece. There is gentleness yet firmness in the writing.