Good article. Space and connection are a strange dance. I prefer the connection, others prefer more space and independence. All good. Or Not. Still trying to figure it out!
Loved the article and Esther Perel's advice and wisdom. Marriage is an interesting endeavor, I think her last sentence nailed it. Humans fuck up a lot and sometimes they admit it.
Knowing what's worth the argument and what's not can be beneficial. I agree that marriage and love are verbs and they require a lot of tending to and also leaving alone at times. How could we possibly even know what we were getting into especially if you marry young. I agree Pegeen, first you must figure out if you like the idea of sharing, compromising and working at love. If it's more fulfilling to live as a couple, marriage is probably a good idea....and keep your village close at hand.
Ha, each time I read an article I’m making notes to investigate further - such with Esther Perel. This is such a hot, fascinating topic. I love that we have replaced obligation with conversation. There are more choices, which means more responsibilities. I don't think I ever went into marriage thinking this person was “the one”or was completeing me in some way. It seemed more about having a common vision, being partners in an adventure, starting a family, building trust and commitment. I think my first marriage ended because our vision changed, there was lack of trust and commitment. But it did not dissuade me from believing in marriage. I love being married, sharing myself, having a partner, appreciating my husband, all that he is and we are as a couple. I love the feeling that we are in this together by choice. It’s very exciting!
Such an interesting article. I'm so curious about Perel and why she is a couples therapist if she says things like this:
Couples therapy is the most difficult. It’s often the most useless. But it’s the best theatre in town.
To me, most couples come because they’re stuck. They’re repeating the same thing over and over again, and they really think that if they do it one more time, it will finally yield some better results. Of course, it doesn’t.
This resonates: We are asking from one person what once an entire village used to provide.
Good article. Space and connection are a strange dance. I prefer the connection, others prefer more space and independence. All good. Or Not. Still trying to figure it out!
Loved the article and Esther Perel's advice and wisdom. Marriage is an interesting endeavor, I think her last sentence nailed it. Humans fuck up a lot and sometimes they admit it. Knowing what's worth the argument and what's not can be beneficial. I agree that marriage and love are verbs and they require a lot of tending to and also leaving alone at times. How could we possibly even know what we were getting into especially if you marry young. I agree Pegeen, first you must figure out if you like the idea of sharing, compromising and working at love. If it's more fulfilling to live as a couple, marriage is probably a good idea....and keep your village close at hand.
Ha, each time I read an article I’m making notes to investigate further - such with Esther Perel. This is such a hot, fascinating topic. I love that we have replaced obligation with conversation. There are more choices, which means more responsibilities. I don't think I ever went into marriage thinking this person was “the one”or was completeing me in some way. It seemed more about having a common vision, being partners in an adventure, starting a family, building trust and commitment. I think my first marriage ended because our vision changed, there was lack of trust and commitment. But it did not dissuade me from believing in marriage. I love being married, sharing myself, having a partner, appreciating my husband, all that he is and we are as a couple. I love the feeling that we are in this together by choice. It’s very exciting!
Thoughtful, wonderful comment. Thx for sharing! :)
Such an interesting article. I'm so curious about Perel and why she is a couples therapist if she says things like this:
This resonates: We are asking from one person what once an entire village used to provide.