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    Medium | Barry Davret | 8/20/20 | 6 min
    37 reads15 comments
    9.7
    Medium
    37 reads
    9.7
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    • Florian
      Top reader this weekReading streak
      2 months ago

      Smart!

      If you look back on the old you and cringe at your immaturity, assholery, or undeserved arrogance, then congratulate yourself. You’ve grown up, matured, and bettered yourself. Some people never do.

      • thorgalle
        Scribe
        2 months ago

        But what if you don’t have much to cringe about? Have you been a good person all along and should just continue the way you’re going? Or have you been docile, living in a box and not trying to push any boundaries?

        It’s good advice, but I don’t think it applies to everyone.

        • Florian
          Top reader this weekReading streak
          2 months ago

          This is probably controversial but here is how I see this: There are probably two types of people who have nothing to cringe about in their past: the ones who haven’t developed Fürth er yet and the ones who truly have had a perfect life. I’d dare to say that the non-cringes I met were primarily the former category... too self obsessed or ignorant.

    • thorgalle
      Scribe
      2 months ago

      This man shares the wisdom of decades, and they’re great reminders!

      Intellectually, you know that in your twenties. But to believe it and live it, you need to experience the disappointment that stems from valuing your worth based on life outcomes. For me, the realization came in my forties.

      But this paragraph hit me most: if in your twenties or even earlier you live a life based on intellectual principles of those who came before you, do you live a good life? I think there is something in learning by lived experience that is more real and stickier than anything you can read about. Maybe it’s unavoidable and just fine that humans fall in the same traps of ambition. It could be the only way they’ll really learn.

    • Pegeen
      ScoutScribe
      2 months ago

      This was a good morning coffee conversation with my husband. Discussing all the points was fun, being honest and having the feedback of a partner was helpful too.

      • gena2 months ago

        Will show this latter to my husband. Some very sage advice

        • Pegeen
          ScoutScribe
          2 months ago

          Gena, this is one of my favorite things about Readup - meaningful discussions with my husband, adult kids, extended family and friends. I’m learning so much from such great writers, individuals that are not necessarily accessible to most. I used to have to have several magazine subscriptions and now I have all of it at Readup. Have fun with your husband!

          • gena2 months ago

            Thanks. Hope you are well.

    • chrissetiana
      Top reader this weekTop reader of all time
      2 months ago

      A pledge you make to yourself to do something every day, forever, that defines your character and individuality — character commitment.

      On it!

    • Carlh572 months ago

      Happiness doesn’t have to be conditional. It starts with loving/forgiving yourself....

    • gena2 months ago

      A good way to look at things.

    • TripleG
      Reading streak
      2 months ago

      Great read. Lots to think about and reflect.

    • EZ19692 months ago

      I like this - it’s good to pause and reflect on where I’m at. This list was really helpful.

    • jeff
      Top reader this weekTop reader of all timeReading streakScout
      2 months ago

      Great list! Really valuable, timeless reminders.

    • DellwoodBarker
      Top reader this weekReading streakScoutScribe
      2 months ago

      For me, the realization came in my 40s.

      💡Yes 💡

      I was a passive-aggressive arrogant fool. I wish I could forget so much of it.

      As recent as five years ago, I thought my writing rivaled the greatest writers in the English language. Now, I blush and cower in a dark closet whenever I glance at my old stuff. But that’s a good thing; it means I’ve improved.

      If you’re prouder of your past than your present, then you haven’t recognized your mistakes, you haven’t gotten better at what you do, you haven’t grown as an individual.

      If you look back on the old you and cringe at your immaturity, assholery, or undeserved arrogance, then congratulate yourself. You’ve grown up, matured, and bettered yourself. Some people never do.

      True~True

      Excellent Read.