Unadopted would turn me inside out. It’s the plight of the innocent, the defenseless, that is just heartbreaking. I have known a few people who were successfully adopted by loving, caring families and still they needed to know their birth parents - their story of where they came from. I can imagine that deep longing, the need to put all the pieces of the puzzle together.
I recently found a half sister who had been searching for us for years. The longing to know where you come from is strong. When my sister found us it started my own journey to know my birth mother and her story.
The truth is that money motivates a surprisingly large number of foster families.
True to an extent, but we never got enough money from the state to come out ahead financially. I understand that some foster parents spend so little on the kids that they doi come out ahead.
Once Anaya’s parental rights were terminated, leaving him in this endless state of limbo was unconscionable.
We had some long-term foster kids who's parents rights were never terminated, but the kids were allowed to age out of the system despite never being returned to their families. We petitioned to have the parental rights terminated so that we could adopt them, but the judge kept coming back with the statement that she did not want to create "legal orphans" even if the parents could never have the kids back. We hated that. The kids are all adults now and we adopted one when she was an adult so that she could have a family. Some of the other adult kids get payments that would end if we adopted them as adults, so we call them our kids anyway. We adopted 6 of our foster kids over the years and just wish the legal system would have allowed more.
Anyone who has worked in the system has these heart breaking stories. I recently read a case for bringing back more orphanages. They have their own problems (which advocates argue we are better able to mitigate in 2020), but at least they are long term and stable for the kids.
Unadopted would turn me inside out. It’s the plight of the innocent, the defenseless, that is just heartbreaking. I have known a few people who were successfully adopted by loving, caring families and still they needed to know their birth parents - their story of where they came from. I can imagine that deep longing, the need to put all the pieces of the puzzle together.
I recently found a half sister who had been searching for us for years. The longing to know where you come from is strong. When my sister found us it started my own journey to know my birth mother and her story.
OMG, how beautiful and exciting! I’m so over the moon for you and your half sister. Good luck on your journey and thanks so much for sharing.
True to an extent, but we never got enough money from the state to come out ahead financially. I understand that some foster parents spend so little on the kids that they doi come out ahead.
We had some long-term foster kids who's parents rights were never terminated, but the kids were allowed to age out of the system despite never being returned to their families. We petitioned to have the parental rights terminated so that we could adopt them, but the judge kept coming back with the statement that she did not want to create "legal orphans" even if the parents could never have the kids back. We hated that. The kids are all adults now and we adopted one when she was an adult so that she could have a family. Some of the other adult kids get payments that would end if we adopted them as adults, so we call them our kids anyway. We adopted 6 of our foster kids over the years and just wish the legal system would have allowed more.
Real heroes right there. The system makes doing the right thing hard, that's why it needs reform.
Good on you J!
That’s an incredible personal story, thanks for sharing.
Anyone who has worked in the system has these heart breaking stories. I recently read a case for bringing back more orphanages. They have their own problems (which advocates argue we are better able to mitigate in 2020), but at least they are long term and stable for the kids.