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    bookbear express | Ava | 3/12/21 | 5 min
    14 reads6 comments
    9.4
    bookbear express
    14 reads
    9.4
    You must read the article before you can post or reply.
    • chrissetiana
      Top reader this weekTop reader of all time
      1 month ago

      You start internalizing every form of rejection. Nothing can be unrelated to you because everything bad that happens is a direct response to you not being good enough.

      Still struggling to unlearn this 😣 Always looking for external validation is so exhausting. At the end of the day, also damaging.

    • DellwoodBarker
      Top reader this weekReading streakScoutScribe
      1 month ago

      Ouch.

      Hardest hitting 5 minute read on ReadUp.

      Guilty.

      Changing the narrative; doing so hurts like Heaven.

    • bill
      Top reader of all timeScoutScribe
      1 month ago

      Yep. Perfect is the enemy of done. This feels familiar to me, a voice I often hear in my head:

      You think the basic problem with yourself is that you don’t have enough self-control. You’re trying hard, but you should be trying way harder. If you had enough control over yourself to stop fucking up, your life would improve.

    • deephdave
      Top reader this weekReading streakScout
      1 month ago

      Wanting to improve is separate from perfectionism. One is centered around accepting who you are, and wanting to put more effort and time into the things you love. The other is centered around hating yourself for not meeting a meaningless ideal.

      • Pegeen
        ScoutScribe
        1 month ago

        Thank you so much for posting this! Perfectionism is epidemic in our culture and needs to be exposed and dealt with in a loving and compassionate way.

    • Pegeen
      ScoutScribe
      1 month ago

      BEYOND at 10!!! I am a recovering perfectionist. It is one of the most disempowering mindsets that gets established very early in one’s life. This is not to blame parents, educational institutions or our culture since this is both a collective and ancestral mindset, especially for women. What I have been involved in is my own excavation process of how and when I became a control freak. And for me, it began when I was young. The messages I got from my parents and school was that I was not enough. And I spent most of my life trying to be enough! It eventually caused various illnesses because the exterior of my body was showing the interior negative self talk in my inner world. Self criticism, self judgement are really harmful and toxic to your entire being. And eventually it will end up presenting itself as some form of dis-ease. My recovery has been slow but steady. Lots of energy work such as tapping, Reiki and Eden Medicine. The only way out for me is to get to the root cause and change my subconscious programming - change my story. It’s become very exciting and empowering work. I know it is something I am meant to share with others who are stuck in this hell hole. And it will be my most rewarding work thus far.